


I'm Here Now

by CowandCalf



Category: The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Canon Divergence, Daryl looks after Rick, Daryl washes Rick's hair, First Kiss, Fix-It, Fluff, M/M, Rick is exhausted, Rickyl, Season 6 Episode 9, Tenderness, Understanding
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-14
Updated: 2017-08-14
Packaged: 2018-12-15 09:33:00
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,509
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11803299
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CowandCalf/pseuds/CowandCalf
Summary: Daryl took care of Rick after the big battle of Alexandria. During the bloody, final fight the bond of the group had been strengthened. Carl survived the grazing shot but Rick couldn't wind down from his warrior mode. Daryl recognized this look in Rick's eyes. He instinctively knew what Rick needed.





	I'm Here Now

**Author's Note:**

> **Disclaimer:** I don't own or profit from anything relating to the show.
> 
> The episode with the great battle fighting together for Alexandria was outstanding. My emotions run so high! I hoped for a short scene at the end where Rick met Daryl again after they had been seperated for so long. Just an eye contact, a hand on a shoulder, anything. But there was nothing. I needed a fix-it to sooth my sore heart.
> 
> My beta Indie is currently writing her next book and life is demanding at the moment. I didn't want to bother her with this little story. So it isn't beta read. I appologize up front for any typo I missed or a wrong stentence structure.
> 
> Daryl normally talks in his slang that makes him even sexier. I love the way he pronounces words, but I'm not a native speaker, and for the love of God I can't get this way of speaking right to put it down into Daryl's dialog. That's the reason I let Daryl talk more or less in a normal way.
> 
> Nevertheless I hope you like it.

All members of the team were standing or sitting on the porch, chewing fingernails, pacing and waiting for news about Carl's condition. Denise confirmed that he was going to be okay. Despite losing an eye, Carl didn't suffer any other head injuries. But Rick was not able to let go of the massive tension in his body. He deseperately waited for Carl to wake up. He needed to be sure that he's fine.

Daryl's clothes were strong-smelling after he pumped gasoline out of the truck's tank into the pool. The fire was still burning. He was not sure if that water could ever be filtered and cleaned again for further use. Denise stitched his cut while he waited impatiently to finally head out to look for Rick. He hadn't gotten all informations what the fuck happened to cause this walker inferno in the first place. He was still breathless after hours of fighting and killing. The confusing mood after such a fight kept his mind swimming with no clear tought to catch. Daryl's worn out state got infiltrated by a high pent up need to fuck. _Anything._ His boner drove him to despair. Instead of hiding in a room to jerk off until his cock ached, Daryl was driven by deep concern over Rick's state. 

Daryl hopped down from the gurney pulling his vest over his shoulders after Denise told him where to find Rick. Michonne met his intense stare, standing next to the door where Carl was recovering from his grazing shot, holding Judith and caressing her little head. Michonne's eyes told him everything he needed to know. Rick was still zoomed out crying and begging. Even through the closed door Daryl heard Rick talking to his still unconscious son. His voice sounded foreign as if Rick was still caught in this maddening killing that ended in pure bloodlust. Rick had to be brougt back from this dark place where his mind was still lingering about.

Daryl never witnessed such sick shit like this battle. He felt shaken too. It was a hard task to wind down after all of them acted like maniacs. They pulled through the night killing with lust and with sheer will each and every walker. They ganged up on the zombies. Each member of the team experienced this rush of pure barbarism. There had to be hundreds of dead, foul-smellig bodies laying everywhere now, scattered like a morbid act of modern art. 

"Come with me." Daryl gave Michonne a sign with his hand telling her to follow him.

He pushed the door silently open to prevent spooking Rick, always keeping a hand on his knife ready to be jumped at. 

"Ey...Rick." Daryl approached Rick with watchfulness. "Rick? You okay, uh?" Darly placed his hand with a soft touch on Rick's shoulder squeezing the muscles through the stained, bloody shirt. He waited for a reaction.

Carl was lying pale but calm between the sheets. Denise did a great job the way she dressed his wound and fixed his eyehole, saving his life. Rick's son was breathing regularly, looking relaxed and asleep.

"Rick...come with me. Come. Let's get ya cleaned up. Have some bite to eat. Ya hear me? Rick...?" Daryl leaned forward keeping his hand on his friend's shoulder, searching for his eyes.

Rick turned his head meeting Daryl's questioning look. But his gaze was unsteady and his lips were quivering. Daryl was shocked about the strange face expression, and the way Rick watched him but didn't seem to notice him only holding on to Carl's hand. This connection kept him from going mental. Daryl breathed slowly. He knew he had to do something for Rick. He needed to act fast.

"Are you with me, Rick? Let's go...Rick. Michonne will sit by Carl's bed. Carl's safe. He's going to wake up soon. Let's go." Darly shoved his hand under Rick's armpit and pulled gently but firmly to get Rick to stand up, not letting go. His stomach felt all hot filled with sarrows about Rick's condition. He needed to make him feel okay again. Daryl hadn't seen Rick often during their battle. The long separation from the team and specially from Rick, plus the difficult and dangerous way back to Alexandria, had Daryl worn out. He was emotionally exhausted. He couldn't wait to be back - , back with Rick, seeing him again, making sure he was alright. He missed this man and it kept him messed up the moment he realized it.

Rick resisted Daryl's grip, straining his muscles, shooting glares in Daryl's direction.

"Carl didn't wake up yet. _I have to wait. I need him to wake up._ " Rick's gravely tone was mixed with a leaden tiredness.

Daryl was always in awe how much strength Rick was able to pull out from nowhere. Rick could fight for hours, to keep the hope up for everyone, to lead always everybody out of the most fucked-up situation. But now his friend needed his help. Daryl wanted to bring him somewhere safe - out of sight - so nobody was going to witness when Rick finally broke down. 

"Michonne's here, Rick. Ya need to change, take a shower. Ya actually stink like the rotten ass of a dead rat." Rick didn't even twitch at this remark.

Michonne petted Rick's back when Daryl was about to pull him out of the room, with the clear aim to get him upstairs and into the nearest bathroom. Rick waited looking at Michonne. He lifted one hand to touch Judith but Rick's hand fall back at his side as if he had forgotten what he wanted to do.

"I'm here, Rick. I watch out for Carl and as soon as he opens his eyes I come and get you. Now go, go with Daryl." Michonne kissed Judith's head while she barely could hold back her tears. She watched Rick, guided by Daryl. Before she closed the door Daryl changed one last look with Michonne. Daryl nodded short and affirmative when he got the mouthed plea from her. _'Help him'._

Before they headed upstairs Carol came around the corner understanding immediately what was going on. Rick only starred into space looking right through his people. Daryl eyed him carefully from the side. The muscles under his hand, where he hold onto Rick, were tensed like cords. Rick was wary and still prepared to meet danger, to fight and to safe his beloved ones, although the combat was over.

"Go. I'll take care that no one will disturb you. Make him take a hot shower. You find a clean shirt in the drawer in the bedroom, pants too. Don't leave him alone for too long." Carol ushered both men up the stairs giving Daryl advises.

"Yes, Ma'am." Daryl's raspy voice had an amused undertone.

Luckily Rick didn't protest or worse, fought Daryl while he was more or less manhandled into the bathroom on the first floor. Daryl closed the door behind him and pushed Rick down, making him sit on the toilet lid. The silent of the new room triggered Rick's fight or flee reflex.

_"Where's Judith!! I haven't seen her! Get out of my way! I NEED TO FIND JUDITH!"_ Rick rocketed upwards wresting himself out of Daryl's grip. But Daryl was expecting such a reaction. Rick going ape was overdue. With a quick move Daryl got Rick in a stealthy grip wrapping both arms around him, pressing him against his body. 

"RICK! RICK! Look at me!! _Christ, Rick!_ Judith is safe. Ya here me? _SHE IS SAFE! She is with Michonne._ Ya just looked at her moments ago! _Hey!"_

He was pressing Rick's body forcefully against his own telling the man in his arms the same information over and over again. Finally Daryl felt how Rick's whole body slumped down, sagging heavy against Daryl's chest.

"She's safe?" The whisper was hoarse. Rick's breath was ragged. 

Daryl almost tripped over his own feet losing his balance with the boneless mass of Rick's body in his arms.

"Yep, Rick, Lill'asskicker's safe. She's with Michonne and they're both sitting with Carl. Yer kids are safe. Ya here me?" 

Rick nodded faintly, giving in. Darly shoved him back onto the toilet lid, panting only a little too fast. He took his friend's hands between his palms before he kept both of them pressed against his chest. Rick's body was shivering.

"Rick, ya with me?" Daryl crouched down to meet Rick's eyes.

"Look at me, Rick. Yeah...ya with me?" Daryl gripped the back of Rick's neck with one hand to hold his head steady, forcing him to focus. Rick's other hand was firmly hugged by Daryl's colloused hand resting against Daryl's chest. "Rick?" Daryl's dark voice was soft and his rough palm grazed over Rick's sticky skin at the hairline of his neck.

"Hmm..." a short nod.

Eventually Rick started to focus and he was really looking at Daryl. His gaze was watery, red-eyed. Daryl saw the madness fading from his friend's eyes caused by killing walkers for hours. Rick's face was covered with dry blood and little chunks of walker's scum. 

"Daryl?" The tears fell from Rick's eyes leaving wet, smeary tracks on his cheeks. "I thought...you suddenly disappeared, didn't respond to my calls...I..." Rick's voice died, drowning in sobs. He kept his lips sealed, losing the fight against the bursting damn in his chest.

"I'm here now. 'm fine." Daryl caught Rick when the other man just fell forward, pressing his face into Daryl's throat, breathing chopped.

"'m here, came back. I knew y'all were in deep shit." Tentatively Daryl snugged his arm around Rick's heaving upper body. He wasn't making any sound while he was crying. Rick's mental collapse made Daryl's chest constrict and he had to swallow hard.

Rick fisted Daryl's leather vest holding on for dear life while he finally let Daryl take over.

"Ya need a shower. Ya stink really bad." Daryl whispered huskily at the side of Rick's head. Rick's sweaty hair tingled his nose. "Ya smell aweful. Carol promised to cut one of my limb off if I won't get ya cleaned up." 

As if Rick saw the shy smile on Daryl's face he slowly sat upright not bothering to wipe the tear streaks off his cheeks. Rick pursed his lips and nodded in agreement avoiding Daryl's eyes.

"I go and find some clean clothes for ya. Go shower." Daryl pulled Rick to his feet while he stood up. He squeezed both of Rick's upper arms before he sneaked out the door. Carol told him already where to find all the pieces for Rick until his own clothes were washed and cleaned.

Before Daryl opened the bathroom door he rested his forehead against the cool surface of the wood. He heard the water of the shower pouring down. Rick was in there, naked and vulnerable. Daryl was used to kill walkers for Rick, to be his shield in battle. Darly would always look out for Rick, keeping him safe. But this here? This was still so new, so unexpected. Daryl's fist crumpled the heap of fabric in a tight grip. He pressed the shirts and pants he found to his nose.  
Daryl's mind flatlined for some moments and he was about to bolt. He was so tempted to escape this pressure. He was never good at dealing with emotions. It was frightening and feelings scared Daryl. He always run from that dark abyss. _But Rick needed him._ Daryl was the only one whom Rick trusted right now. Carol imposed this special task on Daryl. And he still could recall Michonne's lips moving, expressing what she wanted Daryl to do. They all were expecting that he helped Rick to get back to be a human being.  
Daryl fidgeted with his hand, running it down his chest to flaten his blotchy shirt. He ducked his head, squeezing his eyes shut before he pressed the door latch down.

He kept his eyes on the floor, avoiding to watch the shower curtain.

"Rick, ey..uh...Rick. I brought ya clothes. I'm...they're here, okay?" He threw the pieces of clothing into the sink, dried his sweaty palm by rubbing them against his pants. He still got now answer from Rick.

Daryl reluctantly turned to face the shower curtain, eyeing the shadow of the hunched frame of a body in the bathtub. He got worried. Hesitantly he pulled the curtain so far aside to get a glimpse of Rick's whatever he was looking at.

"Rick... _what..da fuck,_ Rick!" Daryl got frightened seeing Rick fully dressed sitting under the sprinkler while cold water got him soaking wet. Rick hugged his knees, looking totally lost while his chin rested on his arm. He shivered and his lips turned already blue.

Daryl turned off the water, pushed the curtain far enough back to have space to move. He got rid of his leather vest, and rolled up his sleeves. 

"Rick, come on. Stand up. Up....come. Ya can't shower with all yer clothes on. Rick, let's take them off." Daryl made sure Rick didn't slip on the wet floor of the bathtub. He made him step out to stand on the carpet. There was no time to be embarrassed or shy. Rick was about to get sucked back into crazy land. Daryl had to do something. There was no way he let Rick unsupervised again. Daryl even contemplated to join Rick under the shower, just to make sure Rick got what needed to be done.

Rick's skin was freezing cold and his hands didn't get the job done to peel his wet shirt off. So Darly gently shoved his hands out of the way. He unbuttoned Rick's shirt and shrugged it off with a few strong pulls. He tossed it on the floor. Daryl had the feeling to undress a doll. Rick didn't say anything, he even kept his eyes closed. Daryl was clueless about how to get his friend back on track. Rick was so aloof as if he had given up. Daryl bit back his fear and focused on the task. One step at a time. He could get Rick clean, get him showered washing off all the dirt, the blood and the rotten flesh.

Unbuckling Rick's belt made Daryl's hands tremble. No time to behave like a teenage girl with issues. "Rick, help me here a lill'bit, would ya?"  
Soaking wet jeans were a bitch to deal with. At the end Daryl pulled hard until the pants with the boxers were a wet mess around Rick's ankles.  
"Step out of the pant legs, Rick." Daryl's voice was husky.

His hands lie warm and solid on Rick's hips to stabilize his stance. While his friend was occupied not to get knocked sideways while his feet were trapped in pant legs, Daryl had a clear view on Rick's soft cock. _Christ._ Daryl licked his lips and sighed ignoring this sweet pain in his chest. But he couldn't look away. He let his gaze roam over Rick's upper body and the slight, dark chest hair covering his pecs. Daryl shut his eyes for a brief moment wiping his forehead on his shoulder. Rick seemed to be completely unaffected by this awkward moment getting undressed to stand naked infront of Daryl.

"Rick, look at me. Yeah, alright. We've a task to fulfill. Understood? Ya gonna take a bath now. Shower's off the table." Daryl waited until Rick met his eyes. "Ya hear me, Rick?" Daryl cupped Rick's cheek with one hand and waited. Rick pressed his lips together, making a jerking move with his head.

That was enough for now. Daryl helped Rick to get back into the bathtub. He let him sit while he checked the running water until it was almost hot. He needed Rick to get warm again. He let the water fill the bathtub in full strength, while he was searching for the soap and to keep himself busy. Rick was an utter distraction sitting damn naked right in front of Daryl, getting his eyes sore from trying not to stare. Rick was a beautiful man and Daryl's longing grew bigger. He kept himself occupied. He rummaged in the cupboard under the sink until he found a washcloth. He threw it into the ascending bath water. 

"Hey, look what I found! Hmmm...peach scented!" A shy smile played with Daryl's lips while he wiggled the bottle of shampoo in front of Rick's eyes. "So we've peach or peach. Actually there's also peach. Which one do ya want? Peach?" Daryl didn't wait for an answer. He tilted the bottle and squeezed a large amount of shampoo into the splashing jet of water where it turned immediately into foam and the intense scent of peach filled the bath room.

The hot water got Rick defrosted. As it seemed he realized now that Daryl actually prepared a hot bubble bath for him. Maybe it was the stupefying diversity of the two situations. Not long ago Rick fought for his life and the life of all his group and family and now he was sitting in a hot bath while peach flavored bath foam tingled his skin. 

Daryl was aware of what he was doing and all of a sudden he felt utterly silly, embarrassed even. He put the shampoo bottle down and struggled to his feet. His cheeks were hot. The urge to flee from this the room was overpowering. With a hasty move he checked the water temperature again. He couldn't surmount his bashfulness and he didn't dare to even look at Rick. Darly mumbled some unintelligible words. He wasn't able to handle this intime, emotive mood anymore.

"Uh...'m outside, call me, if...y'know...I..." Daryl ducked his head ready to turn around.

Rick solid grip around his wrist got him startled. 

"Please...Daryl..." Rick's voice sounded excoriated as if he yelled for hours. "Don't, _please_...stay. Would you...wash my hair?"

Daryl sucked his lower lip between his teeth and chewed some moments. His chest felt a tad too tight. Rick's fingers burnt his skin where they touched him. He closed his eyes and nodded shortly.

"Hmm, yeah..." He flashed Rick a short glance only to turn his head immediately back, letting his hair fall forward to cover half of his face so he could hide behind his messy hairdo.

Rick wanted him to stay. He begged him not to leave. 

Daryl's hand shook slightly holding the shower head getting Rick's hair wet. He sat on the rim of the bathtub combing his fingers through Rick's hair that was sticking together with dried blood. Rick started to relax under Daryl's steady touch. The peach scented foam filled half of the bathtub and Rick's hands were playing with the washcloth.

Daryl heard Rick almost humming and sighing when his hair was lathered and Daryl's finger kept massaging his scalp. They didn't talk. Rick kept his eyes closed leaning in the other man's touch. Daryl saw how Rick began to rub his body with the soaked washcloth using the foam to clean his dirty skin on hands and legs. The silence was comforting and easing Daryl's tension. 

"You okay?" 

"Uh-hu."

"Tilt yer head a lill'." Daryl's palm tenderly lay on Rick's forehead telling him to lean back so no shampoo could run into his eyes.

While Daryl get all the foam out of Rick's hair, making always sure his eyes were protected, Rick continued to scrub his skin clean.

"Done." Daryl stood up putting the shower head back in the mount. "Gimmi that rag." Daryl reached over Rick's shoulder asking for the washcloth with an open hand. 

Daryl spread a large dollop of shampoo over Rick's strong back muscles, soaping his skin thoroughly. His hands were tender, caressing Rick's back while he washed his skin. Daryl rubbed the hole length of Rick's back, up to his neck, over his shoulders and back down to the small of his back. His movements were slow and soothing. He paid special attention to Rick's neck, massaging the sore muscles with his fingers.  
Rick relaxed and bent his head forward. His legs were angled and his arms hugged his knees loosely. Daryl hoped he didn't go too far when his hands got more couraged reaching under Rick's armpits to gently touch his pecs, kneading the solid flesh for a short moment, only to withdraw a little bit too fast. Rick's nipples were hard. Daryl felt an electric bolt jerking through his stomach when his fingers grazed over these hard knobs. The soft moan from Rick made Daryl's heart jump in his chest. He grabbed the rag and rinsed all soap off Rick's skin always keeping one hand solid on Rick's body. 

Daryl bit the inside of his cheek hard when Rick searched for his hand and brought it to his lips. Daryl felt Rick's mouth touching his skin, pressing a tender kiss to the back of his hand. Rick fondled his damp cheek against Daryl's forearm while he held Daryl's hand sandwiched in his own. Rick rested his lips on Daryl's skin. The last kiss into Daryl's palm was so tender. Rick made Daryl touch his face, made him hold his head while Daryl sat motionless on the rim of the bathtub struggling with breathing, not daring to even twitch. He let Rick play with his hand. Darly let Rick do what he needed. At the end he caressed Rick's cheeks and his lips with shy touches of his fingers.

"Thank you, Daryl." Rick's voice was so low Daryl almost missed the words.

Daryl hesitantly withdrew his hand from Rick's grip. 

"Can I... you good? Ya got it from here?...I..uh, wait outside, 'kay?" Daryl stood up a little unsure what to do know. But Rick was washed and he seemed to be more his old self again. So his task was done although the foreign, sweet yearning that tugged at this heart, was more intense then ever.

Daryl didn't wait for an answer. He closed the door silently after he slipped out of the bathroom. He stayed right behind the door to be able to listen what Rick was doing. Daryl needed to make sure Rick got out of the bath and didn't have any other stupid ideas. According to the familiar sound Rick got out of the tub. He was towelling himself off and was getting dressed.

Daryl paced the floor. He bit his nails while his nervousness aggravated. He waited for Rick to come out. It happened something in this bathroom. Daryl needed to know if he only imagined all the reactions from Rick. Breathing was painful and with the fear of getting all hopes destroyed Daryl felt a pain spreading through his chest. _For crying out loud, it was Rick of all people about whom he couldn't stop thinking and dreaming._ As if he ever got lucky to have such a thing happening.  
When Daryl heard how the bathroom door got pulled open, he leaned his back against the opposite wall. He didn't want to show Rick that he totally lost his cool while he washed Rick's soft hair. _He washed Rick's hair._

Daryl propped one foot up flat against the wall. His hands were stuffed deep into the front pockets of his pants. He watched Rick coming out making a beeline where Daryl was standing. Rick swept his gaze all over him. The way Rick strolled towards his slouching figure, running his fingers over his lips, gave Daryl the feeling that his lungs collapsed right there in his chest. Rick came to a halt only inches before their chest touched, leaving Daryl with no air to help ease this dizziness. _Fuck._ Rick placed one hand against the wall right next to Daryl's head. _Double fuck._

Daryl wasn't expecting this evident proof of what just happened between them. With a wild beating heart he eyed Rick through strands of hair. Daryl wasn't able to form a single word and Rick left him no room to withdraw.

He felt how Rick brushed a wisp of hair out of his face only to cup his hand around Daryl's chin.

"I got your message right, the one you gave me while you washed my hair?" Rick's voice dribbled into Daryl's ears like liquid honey. Rick's lips were way to close to his face turning Daryl into a shy, emotionally messed up teenager, not knowing what to do next. He cleared his throat to mumble a word that came close to a 'yes'.

"Do you know how long I've fantasized about how it feels to kiss you?" Rick whispered raspy leaning in before he pressed his parted, soft lips onto Daryl's. The moan that Rick's kiss draw from his throat got licked right out of his mouth by Rick's tongue. Daryl grabbed Rick's shirt to pull him in, pressing him firmer onto his searching lips. The heat that set Daryl's groin on fire evaporated all feelings of timidness. Rick's tongue conquered his mouth, drinking his moans, kissing him gently but possessively by pushing him up the wall, caging his face between both arms.

The kiss didn't last long but got heated fast. Rick broke the kiss and pressed his forehead against Daryl's stroking the side of his neck with his thumb. Darly pulled Rick flush against his body keeping him connected with his crotch. He bit his lips, catching his breath with closed eyes.

"Let's go to see how Carl's doing." Rick stepped out of the embrace and reached out to take Daryl's hand in his, interlacing their fingers. He smiled assuringly back at Daryl pulling him along to head downstairs.

Rick didn't let go of his hand. Carol smiled at both when they entered the room where Carl was resting. Michonne welcomed them with a bright smile and they knew, Carl was going to be okay. Judith was sound asleep in Michonne's arms.

Daryl was still short of breath. It was not that easy to catch enough air while Rick flashed him this killer smile from time to time. They sat both by Carl's side while Rick talked in a soft voice to his son.

Darly stepped outside after a while to get some fresh air. He hoped to regain some sanity after what happened within the last half hour, but this intention flew right out the window when he looked up from his spot on the porch and saw Rick standing there. His friend clenched and unclenched his jaw, piercing Daryl's eyes with this intensity of want. Both men locked eyes with each other. Daryl exhaled slowly, controlled but his blood rushed south fast making his hard-on almost painful. He felt the puls throbbing in his vein which meandered at the side of his stiff cock.

Rick stepped up to Daryl reaching out for his hand. Daryl entwinded his fingers with Rick's while he stood up.

"Ready?" Rick asked with a smirk.

Daryl squeezed Rick's hand once and nodded shorty while a soft smile shone at the corner of his mouth.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you very much for reading.
> 
> I'm cowandcalf on tumblr. Jump by and say 'hi'. It's always great to get to know new people.


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